Nose Cancer

It sounds like a comedy disease, doesn't it? Nose Cancer. Something that might afflict the heroine's husband in a farce.

In the very first scene, Nose Cancer (an unassuming little trickster named Squamy) begins to whisper. At first only the husband and then the heroine can hear Squamy, but by the second act, Squamy has subsumed the husband and has become the loudest, biggest, meanest monster ever. No one in the village can escape its wrath as Squamy rampages across the countryside. In the final slapstick battle, booger jokes and mucus fly, and at last the heroine vanquishes the evil Squamy and reclaims her beloved husband. As the lights fade on the final scene, the husband and the heroine kiss and rejoice beside a receding lake of mucus, all that is left of their arch-nemisis, Squamy the Nose Cancer.

How many nose cancers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A nose cancer walks into a bar...

The famer's daughter opens the door and it's a traveling nose cancer.

I'm still working out the punchlines.